00:00 Today's episode discusses the psychology and biology of desire, love, and attachment, including how childhood attachment styles influence adult attachment styles and the biological mechanisms involved in attraction.

07:48 The podcast explores the psychology and biology of desire, love, and attachment, including the different types of love, the focus on monogamous heterosexual love in research, and the biological mechanisms involved in desire, love, and attachment.

15:17 Attachment styles in humans, which can predict romantic attachment styles, can be categorized into four patterns: secure attachment, in which the child feels confident that the caregiver will be responsive to their needs and is happy when the caregiver returns; insecure-avoidant attachment, in which the child avoids or ignores the caregiver both when they are present and when they return; insecure-anxious attachment, in which the child is clingy and anxious even when the caregiver is present; and disorganized attachment, in which the child exhibits inconsistent and unpredictable behavior towards the caregiver.

23:09 Attachment styles in children, such as secure attachment, insecure-avoidant attachment, insecure-anxious attachment, and disorganized attachment, can predict attachment styles in romantic partnerships later in life, indicating that we are hardwired for attachment and that the same neural circuitries and hormonal responses are repurposed for different types of attachments.

30:52 Our nervous system is tethered to the nervous systems of others from the earliest stages of our lives, and our templates for attachment in romantic relationships are based on a template established through our primary caregiver, which can be modified through neuroplasticity and understanding that these templates are malleable.

38:21 The autonomic nervous system controls our bodily functions and can be influenced by early interactions with caregivers, shaping our tendencies towards alertness, calmness, or anxiety, which can be adjusted through various techniques and practices.

45:59 Attachment is about where our autonomic nervous system resides, and it is important to recognize our tendencies and be able to regulate our own autonomic nervous system even in the absence of another person in order to establish healthy interdependence.

53:41 Empathy is about the autonomic seesaw of one individual driving the autonomic seesaw of another, which is a vital principle for falling in love, forming attachments, and the desire and mating process itself.

01:02:13 The brain areas associated with sexual function and empathy have been mapped out, and the coordination between the autonomic nervous systems of two individuals during the mating dance is facilitated by the insula and prefrontal cortex, while positive delusion, or the belief that only one person can evoke certain feelings, is predictive of long-term attachment.

01:10:16 Positive delusion, which involves frequent and intense criticism, defensiveness, stonewalling, and contempt, is a strong predictor of relationship failure and divorce, as it goes against the neural circuits associated with desire, love, and attachment.

01:18:50 Dr. Fisher has categorized individuals on dating sites into four groups based on their self-reported preferences and behaviors, including high sensation seeking and novelty seeking (dopamine category), valuing stability and following rules (serotonin category), being directive and comfortable expressing desires (testosterone category), and having high estrogen levels (estrogen category), and found that individuals in each category tend to pair up with others in the same category.

01:27:21 Individuals in the estrogen category, who describe themselves as nurturing and prefer someone else to make major decisions, tend to pair up with individuals in the testosterone category, who are directive and comfortable expressing desires.

01:35:33 Contrary to the common belief that people are attracted to others with similar brain states, studies have shown that individuals tend to select partners with resting brain states that are different or even opposite to their own, highlighting the complexity of desire, love, and attachment.

01:43:31 Asking and answering a series of progressively more emotional and deep questions can create a sense of attachment and even love between two people, potentially due to the synchronization of their autonomic nervous systems.

01:51:40 The level of self-expansion experienced in a romantic relationship can influence how attractive individuals perceive people outside of the relationship to be.

01:59:42 The subconscious processes and biology, including hormones and pheromones, play a significant role in shaping our attraction, desire, and attachment to romantic partners.

02:08:03 Certain substances, such as Maka, Tongat Ali, and Tribulus, have been shown to increase libido and arousal, but it's important to consult with a physician and understand that increasing dopamine or testosterone alone may not lead to increased libido.

02:16:44 Maka has been shown to significantly increase libido and offset SSRI-induced sexual dysfunction, Tonga Ali has been reported to increase libido by increasing free testosterone, and Tribulus Terestis is commonly sold as a supplement for increasing testosterone but its effectiveness is unclear.

02:25:26 Tribulus Terestis has shown potential in increasing testosterone and sexual desire in certain populations, particularly in females, but more studies are needed to fully understand its effectiveness.